Why is it that I have so much that I need to say, but for once in my life my big mouth wants to keep quiet? I don't understand it. Why is it that I can't just tell someone how I feel? Why is it that I feel as though I have to pretend I don't have feelings for someone when I really do? Why is it that I'm possibly falling for someone who is in a relationship? What the hell is wrong with me? These are the many unanswered questions that I have in my life right now. I am falling for someone who I am really good friends with and they just happen to conveniently be in a relationship. Why is this happening to me? I seriously don't understand my logic in this whole situation, but you know sometimes I lack intelligence and make the stupidest decisions ever, like this for instance. I mean seriously how much stupider can I get...I'm falling for a guy who has a girlfriend!!!! News flash Kristen you probably don't have a chance in hell to be with him. But yet I'm sticking around and almost in a sense being played as his girlfriend on the side and I'm going to be the idiot left hurt at the end of all of this. I'm seriously a freakin' moron. I don't know what to do. Do I tell them how I feel or continue with my little act? On one hand I could tell them I feel and potentially lose a friend or make things awkward...or...I could tell them how I feel and gain something. I just don't know what to do. I'm so confused. I'm caught in a really tough spot right now, and I don't want to fuck anything up. Why is this so hard? I need a sign, something to let me know what the right decision is.
"It's getting hard to be around you/ There's so much I can't say/ Do you want me to hide the feelings/ And look the other way?" -Jesse McCartney's Just So You Know
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